Why Hasn’t He Called/Why Hasn’t She Called Back?

Well that is the question that is always asked when the object of your affection fails to call you as promised or fails to return your call. Let’s say that a guy is introduced to a woman at a social event and they really hit it off. They talk to each other for most of the night. At the end of the night, the woman suggests that the guy gives her a call. So they exchange numbers. A couple days later, the guy calls but the woman doesn’t answer so he leaves her a voice message with his name, phone number, a reference to the social event they met at, and a time that is best for her to reach him. However, after more than a week, the woman has not called back. The guy wonders: why hasn’t she returned my call? Another example is that a woman who has been eyeing a guy in their yoga class for a couple months finally decides to start a conversation with him on the last day of the yoga session. The conversation goes well and he appears interested. He even asks her for her phone number and she happily obliges. But after a week or so, he has not called her. So it begs the question: Why didn’t he call?

We all know that there is a feeling of excitement when single people meet someone that he/she is attracted to. The opportunity to spend time with the object of your affection is very hard to pass up. So when the object of your affection doesn’t call you in a timely manner, there is almost an immediate tendency to assume many things and jump to conclusions. A few emotions may surface -mostly negative. It’s easy to start thinking the worst such as: a) I must have said or done something wrong when we met, b) I probably sounded too nervous on the voicemail, c) that guy/girl probably didn’t think I was that attractive, or d) that person probably was already seeing somebody else and I’m being played. The fact is that there could be thousands of possible reasons why someone didn’t call you. And about 95% of those reasons may have nothing to do with you directly. It would be easy for anyone to paint the wrong picture of what has happened or to overanalyze the situation. The fact is that you really don’t know what is going on with the other person. And waiting by the phone certainly doesn’t help.

The best thing to do is to stay detached. It sounds simple but it may be difficult to do at first. Even though you had a good time with that person, it’s best to leave that memory in the past. Worrying and doubting will only lead you farther away from what you want. You would be surprised how beneficial it is to detach yourself. It sends a vibration to the Universe that you are fine with your life regardless if the object of your affection calls you or not. You will be more relaxed and confident-which happen to be two attractive qualities. You are in no worse situation than where you began. Your happiness will not be dependent on whether somebody calls you or returns your call. More often than not, that person calls you when you least expect it. That would be a nice bonus. There is a saying: “God’s rejection is His protection.” In other words, something/someone better will come your way.

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